The time has finally come. After more than 30 years Star Wars is finally getting a sequel. A true sequel. None of this prequel nonsense which were seemingly designed to pierce directly through us like a Darth Maul double sided light saber thrust directly through our Qui-Gon hearts. Like so many Jar Jar Binks shaped torpedoes launched directly at our exhaust shafts. No. This sequel is not that movie. Episode VII is currently registering enough hype to power Cloud City, and is going to land with the impact force of an orbital strike from a star destroyer. In honor of this most spectacular spectacle, our team is going full Force (see what we did there?), and are declaring this week to be Star Wars week as we count down the days until the new release and celebrate all things Star Wars. Our first mission? Bringing you a round up of 11, count ’em, 11 holiday gift ideas for your home. Many Bothan spies died to bring you this information…
Han and Leia Towels
Score some nerd points with that new couple in your life by getting them a set of these his and her towels, and pay homage to one of the best moments of improv in film. “I love you too” was supposed to be Han Solo’s response to Leia before he took a carbonite flash freeze in Empire. Instead, Harrison Ford, quite possibly being the real life manifestation of the badass characters he’s played up to and including Indiana Jones, made both this last minute ad-lib and movie history.
Lightsaber Candle Holder
A more civilized weapon for a more civilized time also makes for a pretty rad holder for a candle stick. We can’t verify whether or not any Jedi actually used their laser swords for any other purposes (turkey carver anyone?), but the Sith master himself may have used his for a little mood lighting. This candle stick holder is a replica of Lord Vadar’s lightsaber, and certainly looks the part when paired with one of the included red candles. But you could always go blue if you want to return him to his Anikan roots.
Family Decal Set
Featured in the rear windows of minivans and SUVs around the country, those family decal stickers have been making the rounds for a while now. And they’ve always been pretty boring with the exception of those cool zombie ones, but that’s just because they haven’t been given the Star Wars treatment yet. But now you can finally do it right with this set of 50 decals, and arrange to your heart’s content.
Death Star Cookie Jar
That’s no moon. A million voices cried out in joy and had their hunger silenced once they got their hands on this Death Star cookie jar. It’s ceramic body is easily cleaned, and at 9 inches in diameter you’ll be able to store plenty of sweets behind its planet crushing laser. Now all you have to do is figure out what type of cookies Grand Moff Trakin would have preferred.
You’re gonna need a beverage to wash down all those scrumptious cookies, so why not make yourself a nice warm cup of tea. None of that tea bag stuff, though. No, no. You’re too good for that. Fix yourself up a premium cup of the loose leaf. To do that, you’ll need to enlist the services of a tea pot. But don’t worry: R2’s got your back.
Death Star Tea Infuser
It’s hard to make loose leaf tea without a tea ball, and this Death Star Tea Infuser is just the thing. The grip that hooks to the cup or tea pot is even a little TIE fighter because of course it is. Ready to hold your favorite batch of chai, Earl Grey, or chamomile. Turbo laser towers not included.
Let’s play a game. It’s called: look at this hoodie and act like it’s not the most incredible thing you’ve ever seen. Ready? Go. Is this hoodie not the most incredible thing you’ve ever seen? Medical note: if your answer isn’t some form of “Yes!” or “Hell, yes!” you should immediately check your pulse because your heart may not in fact be beating.
Ewok Ladies Hooded Tank Top
The Chewie hoodie is awesome in every way and it comes in all sizes, but we admit there’s a chance that dressing up as the original Wookie himself might be slightly more appealing to men. But worry not nerdettes! This hooded Ewok tank top should do the trick! According to the description, this outfit “makes you look like an Ewok”. According to the look of bliss on that model’s face, that is the best thing that will ever happen to you.
Vadar BBQ Apron
It’s time to get your grill on. But we know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking: how can I grill while expressing my unreasonable love for all things Star Wars? We’re here for you, Grill Master. Express your dark arts of red meat with this Darth Vadar apron, and annihilate the rebel scum. Or at least their appetites.
X-Wing Knife Block
You read that right. It’s real. This is happening. This is a knife block, and a complete knife set that becomes an X-Wing when you put everything away. The fighter that killed the Death Star makes a great launching pad for your kitchen cutlery. You just know this is the setup commander Skywalker has in his kitchen…
One for the kids (or you we don’t judge). This lightsaber night light adds some mood and magic to any room. It’s remote controlled, can be changed to 8 different colors, and comes with two different hilts. It’s 28 inches long, and guaranteed to keep the monsters away.